My fingers burn.
Cigarettes used to do that, but no more
Now it’s a different heat that singes my skin
It doesn’t hurt, quite the opposite
Relief comes from the pain and lingers
The breathes I take are too deep for my lungs
I struggle to try to keep up with my veins
Wondering why my body is numb, yet so sensitive
I can feel everything now, as if my life was behind a veil
Nothing seems to make sense but I understand so much more
I can see the void now in all it’s glory
Not all of it, for I’m not allowed
Though I feel I already have the right of passage to see it All
So my hand reaches out none the less
What is this immaculate sense of euphoria, this wondrous haze?
I might not ever know, but the answer’s been shown from the start
I’ve seen it, I know the answer but it’s clouded behind a flash of fog
Knowing me though, I’ll say “Fuck you” to whatever stands in my way.
I’ll never let this sense of blackness and light leave my memory.
It would be a sin of which I don’t even believe in.